Two leaders came through my inbox in the same week last year. Both were VPs at multinational firms based here in Dubai. Both had been told by their HR business partner, more or less verbatim, that coaching "might help."
Before I get into what happened with each of them, it's worth pausing on the question underneath both of their stories: how do you actually know if you're ready for this kind of work, rather than just being told you should try it. I've written more broadly about what executive coaching involves and how an engagement typically unfolds in Wardah Harharah's overview of executive coaching, and this article picks up where that one leaves off, focused specifically on timing and readiness.
One of the two leaders opened our first call by describing, in specific detail, a pattern she'd noticed in three separate performance reviews going back five years, always some version of "brilliant strategist, but people find her hard to read." She wanted to understand it, not defend against it.
The other spent the first fifteen minutes explaining why his manager had misjudged the situation, why the 360 feedback didn't reflect reality, and why, honestly, this whole process felt a bit unnecessary given how well his team's numbers were doing.
I coached the first one for a year. It was some of the most rewarding work I've done. The second, I referred elsewhere, not because he was a bad leader, but because he wasn't ready, and starting anyway would have wasted both our time.
That contrast comes up more than people expect. Readiness, not seniority or job title, is what actually determines whether coaching works.
Readiness Isn't About How Bad Things Are
The biggest misconception I run into is that coaching is a response to crisis, that you bring in a coach when something has visibly broken. In practice, some of my most effective clients were performing exceptionally well by every external measure. What made them ready wasn't dysfunction. It was a specific internal posture: a willingness to look honestly at the gap between how they see themselves and how they actually land on others.
There's research behind this that I find genuinely useful, not just reassuring. A controlled study of executives and senior managers by researcher David MacKie found that a coachee's readiness for change, measured before coaching even began, was one of the strongest predictors of whether leadership effectiveness actually improved afterward. Not the coach's methodology. Not the tools used. The person's own readiness walking in the door.
Separately, a growing body of coaching outcomes research points to something similar from a different angle. The working relationship between coach and client, the honesty of it, the shared agreement on what you're actually working toward, tends to matter more than which framework or assessment gets used. That only works, though, if the client shows up willing to be seen clearly.
The Signs I Look For
A few patterns tend to show up in the leaders who get real value from coaching:
You can describe the pattern, even if you can't yet explain it. You've noticed something repeating, in feedback, in how meetings go, in who avoids bringing you bad news, and you're curious about it rather than defensive.
You're not looking for validation. You want an accurate mirror, not a cheerleader. If a coach only ever confirmed what you already believed about yourself, you'd find it useless within a month.
You have room to change something, not just talk about it. Coaching works when there's an actual arena, a team, a transition, a strategic decision, where new behaviour can be tested and observed. Insight without application fades fast.
Someone whose judgment you trust suggested it, and some part of you agreed. Not because you were told to attend, but because it landed on something true.
The Signs You're Not There Yet
None of these are character flaws. They're just useful information.
You're doing it because someone above you insisted, and you haven't found your own reason yet. You're in the middle of a crisis so acute that what you actually need right now is crisis management, not developmental work; those are different conversations, and a good coach will tell you that. You're fundamentally looking for someone to agree with your read of a difficult colleague or situation, rather than examine your own part in it. Or you simply don't have the bandwidth right now. Coaching demands real attention between sessions, and forcing it into an already maxed-out season rarely produces anything lasting.
If any of that sounds familiar, it doesn't mean coaching is off the table forever. It often means the timing is wrong, not the idea.
Why This Reads Differently in the GCC
Readiness shows up a little differently across this region than it does elsewhere, and it's worth naming. In many organisations here, hierarchy and deference to senior figures run deep, which means leaders sometimes agree to coaching out of respect for whoever suggested it, without genuinely owning the decision themselves. I've also seen the reverse: leaders who are highly ready internally but hesitant to admit it publicly, because asking for developmental support can still be read, in some corporate cultures here, as an admission of weakness rather than what it actually is, a sign of seriousness about the role.
Part of my job in that first conversation is simply helping someone tell the difference between compliance and genuine readiness, because only one of those leads anywhere.
If You're Still Weighing It
If you're trying to work out where you sit in all this, that uncertainty itself is worth paying attention to rather than rushing past.
And if, after some honest reflection, you're still unsure whether now is your moment, that's a perfectly reasonable thing to bring to a first conversation. I'd rather have that honest exchange with you than start something neither of us is ready for.
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